An Elegy

Death brings life into perspective. Especially the death of someone alive and kicking; someone who you feel is a constant fixture in your ever changing landscape. This is an eulogy to Ramesh Bhai, a man of steel who was soft at heart.

I got introduced to him through my business partner and that too at a time when I required muscle power behind me due to certain tension at business. He was my Biz Partner’s distant cousin but was more a brother than a friend. The Bhai suffix to his name was true in both counts; he was an elder brotherly figure for all of us and was also one of the most well-known muscleman figures in his area. I will always remember Bhai as someone who was wily enough to siphon money off all the 20 something’s around us and at the same time maintain a completely beguiling naivety which was would catch us completely off guard that we could never be angry with him; at the least not for a long time.

I got a taste of this simple, unassuming man’s powers when one day he dropped me home and every other person on the road saluted to him. He flippantly returned their greetings and dropped me home as if nothing new had happened. But he always treated me with deference, with a respect given to someone well-learned, though I was couple of years younger to him. That attitude never changed, though my respect for and awe of him had increased manifolds. I remember him to have helped in many a tight spots that we faced as part of our business, not with his muscle power but more with his presence and support.

One fine day Bhai fell in love. The man who could smash a person’s skull with his fist was completely powerless before a girl. He fought a long battle with his mother to convince her over the match. Last year after all the drama, melodrama and action he got married amidst all the fanfare. Bhai turned a new leaf after his marriage. He became a lot more responsible about life, took on a job (a completely alien concept as far as he was concerned) and we starting meeting him seldom. Anytime we called him, he was busy. I for one was happy that he had left his wayward ways behind to settle down in life. He celebrated his first wedding anniversary last month. His wife is expecting their first kid. And in midst of all these unfinished business Bhai died day-before-yesterday night, in a road accident, all alone with none of his friends, well-wisher or family around him. HE sped on a speed breaker, lost his control, flew with his bike and hit his head on a lamp post. His head split and he apparently died on the spot. All the while his helmet was hanging in his arm. He was drunk and was under pressure at office in regards to work and had enough to worry about at home due to the tiffs between his wife and his mother. I met him last on Feb 16^th. He went without saying a goodbye, with a lot of unfulfilled promises. I am angry with him for leaving all of us shell shocked. I am angry with him for shirking his responsibility towards his wife, his unborn kid and his family.

But his death brought a few things into clear view. One, never be angry with someone, you might never get a chance to patch up later. Two, never think twice before saying sorry, because you might not be able to say it ever again. Three, for the people who matter to you most, keep your ego aside, you might be missing on some very precious moments because of your ego. Its ok to be humble with the people who matter. Its ok to be doormat too, because with the people who matter to you, you do the utmost duty of letting them wipe their feet by being one. Love like you will never love again; Enjoy like there is no tomorrow; Laugh like there is no sorrow; because who knows tomorrow may never come.